Written by: Coach D, Special to CC2K
Coach D gets down to the nitty gritty on upcoming sequels, offering his take on if they’ll be worth the price of admission.
My usual internet surfing involves checking out upcoming movies and deciding what tickles my cinematic fancy. As I was cruising around the other day, I noticed that there is another Jackass movie coming out, and it’s even in 3D. So I ask myself, “Could I sit through another movie with a bunch of near 40 year olds beating the shit out of their bodies for comedic entertainment? Hell yes I can!” So I decided to dig deeper and see what else is on the way and decide if it will be a Hell yes or No thanks.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (September 10)
I am not going to lie, I loved the Resident Evil games. I used to sit in the dark and get the ever living shit scared out of me. And when the first movie came out, I was somewhat excited to see it. I was so disappointed. The storyline was good because it somewhat followed the game, but the whole zombie thing was just not in yet. Then the second and the third movies came out, and it was just the first movie played out all over again. I mean come on, how many times can you search around for survivors and kill zombies? Obviously, Milla Jovavich thinks at least one more time, but I say
Jackass 3D (October 15)
I already hit on this one. When you get to watch a bunch of idiots smack each other around and, as seen in past movies, do crazy stupid shit like staple their ass cheeks together, you know I want to see some more. Since Johnny Knoxville is the man and wants to keep up with the trends, this time around Jackass is in 3D. I watched the trailer and it starts with Knoxville in a suit, on a jet ski, flying through the air, enough said.
Paranormal Activity 2 (October 22)
I just saw the first one not too long ago. I told myself and my wife that I was not going to see the first one until it came out on DVD, and that’s just what we did. Now, I’m not much of a horror movie person anymore, just not my thing, but this moving rocked. It was even better in the dark and having the sound turned up so we could hear the foot steps in the background. It pretty much put the Blair Witch Project to shame. The whole movie I kept saying to my wife, “Oh hell no, this is not happening.” So when I saw that a sequel is coming out, I couldn’t help get a little excited. This may be another wait-for-DVD release, so at least I know I will have my safe bed to run to if I need to.
HELL YES (DVD)
Saw 3D (October 29)
Great, another movie with a guy, who I thought was dead, playing with a puppet and killing people in increasingly grisly and convoluted ways. It has been done at least six times before this one that I know of. I know it must be making good money because they keep making them, and that it is in 3D, but come on get it over with. Thank god the trailer says it’s the last one.
Little Fockers (December 22)
Ask any of my friends and they will tell you that I love “stupid” funny movies. This could have been one of them, but this is the third movie in the Fockers franchise, and it is getting stale. Supposedly it has been 10 years since the second movie and there are two little Fockers running around in Ben Stiller’s family, and grandpa De Niro is coming to visit. I know it will most likely be funny, and De Niro is the bomb, but the “I have my eyes on you” and ” circle of trust” is getting old. It may fall down to what mood I am in and what else is showing in the theater.
Scream 4 (April 2011)
Now I know that April is a long time down the road, but when I saw this I had to put it in here. When the first Scream hit the sliver screen it was huge. It was directed by classic horror film maker Wes Craven, and it marked a resurgence of slasher movies. I loved the first one, and even the second movie was decent, but when the third movie came out it was getting old. How many boyfriends, lovers, or brothers can Sydney Prescott have that are killers. Poor girl.
The Hangover 2 (May 26 2011)
I have to ask myself, can I make it through another gut busting movie like this and not piss myself? Gawd, I hope so. The first installment of this series was an instant classic with laughs at every turn. Like I said previously I am a huge fan of “stupid” comedy, and this was definitely a stupid funny movie. I can’t wait to see what antics will top Stu getting his tooth ripped out or Alan getting punched by Tyson to the tune of “In the Air Tonight”. The only details that are out now is that the movie is going to take place in Asia somewhere, maybe Bangkok? Oh shit, this is going to be good.
HELLS TO THE YES!